Tuesday, February 2, 2010


Eyes. Often called mirrors to the soul. What do they tell? What secrets do they hold? Lies. Truth. All the gray misty areas in between. Everything, and yet nothing. Translucent to my fears. Opaque to my foes.

I often stare at mine. In the mirror. While passing windows. Every chance I get. I want to know, what hides behind those eyes? What have I hid away, so carefully crafted away, even from myself?

Slowly, some memories return. Etched painfully in the past. Returning to haunt the present and illuminate the future with overcast desperation.

To think, I once rejoiced in the day that I thought life was changing, when then nightmares would end. It was a new beginning. Reality had it though; it was merely an old start. Life reoccuring. I fell into their shoes. I should have seen I coming. I was too young. Too naive.

Cast aside, oblivious to my predicament, life shaped me. Used me. Tore me and bruised me. I had no fight. I knew not what I was fighting, nor what to fight for. Carried through on life's torrents. Even now, safety escapes me.

Can you see through the haze? Can you see through the torment? I don't expect you to. I don't believe you can. Reality screams at me that no one can. I push this false reality away.

Someone can.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone


Gavin said...

Whoa...how'd you do that fancy effect thing on the first picture? That's so cool looking.

Great post btw. I've often wondered what people see when they look me in the eye. Maybe I should ask someone sometime.

Sir Thomas AKA (Winters Reaper) said...

I see need...

but only you hold the key to that answer... what is it you need?

love the post...

findingmywingsinlife said...

I am stunned. I know you so well and I've seen you post anything and everything (as is your personality) so I'm pretty sure you'll understand this comment, and if not we can talk it out later when we get together for a few drinks again, but you've just posted something here that I wasn't sure you'd ever say. There is hope in you after all ;)

This was very beautiful btw. Thought provoking and challenges the reader to think in an introspective way.

Triana said...

Let me first apologize, I'm horrible about responding to comments. I have every intention to, and then my mind races away on a million different thoughts. Bad me.

Gavin ~ I have a few applications on my Iphone that I've been playing with. I've always like to manipulate pictures. One of my favorite blog lines: "from the right angle, we all resemble angels" - in my view, beautiful pictures are all about playing on surroundings, angles, lighting, and other characteristics.

I did this to my eyes because I have *ALWAYS* been told that I have odd colored eyes. Something you can really only see in person. They're intensely star-burst blue. So I played on it.

Sir Thomas ~ Not sure what name to call you by, do you have a preference?

What do I need? Do we have all day to discuss this? The easiest answer is in plain view: If I knew what I needed, I would have it.

Wings ~ Drinks... I miss drinks :( Especially right now. Life's unfair blows are torchering me. Only my handicap keeps me safe; and not for long I fear.

You know that some where, maybe deep within, there has always been hope in me. Endless hope. Why else would I have so foolishly followed my heart this far?

I'm glad you found this to be thought provoking. I was in an introspective mood and am glad I was able to convey that.

Eye candy tomorrow. Maybe that will pick up my spirits? Saturday will be the most difficult. Xander's birthday party. Distraction -- miniature Rock N the Fort on Saturday at 4-D's. Teay's Vein, of course, along with others. I'll buy.

Escapist said...

Hiya !
Yes eyes behold lot of uncertain things.....


Brosreview said...

Eyes... reflect one's personality. Well, that is what I have read and... well, believed as well. But, sometimes they can be deceiving. It is hard to "know someone". It take s a lot of time, a lot of patience, a lot of understanding and consideration. One can merely presume and deduce from the eyes, but, if words complement them eyes, understanding can be provoked.

A great post!

Gavin said...

I have an award for you. (:

JenniAsh said...

I love this, keep writing.