Tuesday, February 9, 2010

never my own

Oh, you again. Not you. I don't want you. Dammit. You. Frustration flashes. I don't want to talk to you. Can you see, I'm just not in the mood. Not you. Where is he? Oh, it's still you. Frustration escapes me. Focus. Yes. I can do that. I can come over. Don't expect me. I'll be there. Sometime. Now? No. Not now. Pull at my hair in frustration. Always frustration. Always, emotion. Never the right emotion. Sometimes the right emotion. Never real. Always fake. Fake emotion. Playing at my emotions. You do that. No, not you. You. Stop confusing me. I want to come over. I will come over. Don't tell her? Oh. Her. Oh. Frustration jumps again. I want to. You confuse me. You don't care. I care. Why don't you care? Why do I care. Again with this frustration. Always fake. You say I'm wrong. You say I don't believe. I'm not fake. I know what I don't believe. Oh. You again. Why is it you? I don't want you. Why do you want me? Don't answer that. You already have. I don't like your answer. We are alike. We are not alike. I want you. Not him. Dammit. Frustration again. Teeth gritting. Dammit. Go away. Stay away. You disappear too often. Stop disappearing. Can't make up my mind.

It was never mine to make.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone


Spaghetti Fields said...

i wish the blogs had like buttons. you are always so down to earth and poetic. Even with the painful sides life offers. I love it.

Brosreview said...

Very simple! Very frustrating. thanks to the repetition! You help us feel you.

JenniAsh said...

I love this post! The short, often broken sentences make it more poignant... hats off for the creativity.