“Maybe I’m the one. Maybe I’m the one who is a schizophrenic psycho.”
~A line from Puddle of Mud, that fits me to a T.
I completely stole this from my new friend Aren, because it made me laugh my ASS off. For a very long time. A VERY long time. I haven’t read a survey/questionnaire this good, in well, ever. I will post my own answers in italics directly below the question along with my scoring on each question. YES! Time for the festivities to begin!
Religion/Spirituality & Beliefs I RARELY will divulge into the subject of religion, but for this purpose …
1. In terms of religious/spiritual views, I consider myself to be a follower of, primarily:
i) European Heathenism
j) Non-European Indigenous Paganism (e.g. Shintoism)
k) Neo-Pagan, Wiccan, or New-Age
l) Atheismm) Agnosticismn) Scientology
o) Other specific organized religionp) My own syncretistic pick n' mix spirituality
I’m agnostic, so (m): +2 points for me!
2. In terms of my own approach to my beliefs, I
a) Always try to abide literally to my specific sacred text(s)
b) Try to interpret any scriptures according to a modern context, with room for reasonable latitude of interpretation
c) Hold nothing as particularly sacred. Do whatever I want, whenever I want
d) Recognize the value and possibility of higher standards, but try to always find my own path, drawing inspiration from wherever I recognize quality and truthfulness
Have to go with (d): +2
Total: 43. In terms of modern society,
a) Church/religious institution and state should always be kept separate
b) State should have a sponsored and official religion
An easy (a): and a quick –1
Environment, Naturalism & Green Issues
4. In terms of technology, the environment, and progress
a) Everything should continue unabated, with the uninterrupted pursuit of technological advancement the highest goal
b) We should all become hard-line Eco-warriors, and the development of technology and industry should be severely restricted
c) We significantly need to alter the balance and recognize that our consumption of resources needs to be more moderated, that the environment is precious, and that we will all be required to make some sacrifices if we wish to preserve the natural beauty of the world
I’m such a (c) here!: and I score another +1
Total: back up to 45.
In terms of getting out into Nature
a) Nature is beautiful beyond comparison, and I like nothing more than getting outside into the wilderness as much as possible
b) The countryside is boring. I'll stick to my city apartment.
c) I like a pretty view, but from the window of my luxury cruise liner
Bring on (a) and get me OUT into nature. Anywhere. Add +2
6. In terms of my mobile phone, laptop, or other portable modern technology
a) The thought of being disconnected from the modern world for a few days fills me with horror! I'll take my phone with me everywhere.
b) I'll specifically switch off or leave behind my phone so that I can enjoy being out in nature, completely uninterrupted
c) Pointless modern dependencies. I don't need any such technological contrivances.
Clarification before I get jumped on for answering this, YES I am fricken attached to my phone, normally. But find me horseback, hiking, biking, rafting or anything that truly FREES my soul, and you will not find my phone. Yes, I walk on the treadmill texting & blogging. The treadmill is not “free-ing”. Therefore, my answer is (b). Yes, I can break my crackberry addiction. And +2 bringing the
Total to 8
Love & Sexuality Did I mention this is my FAVORITE category?
7. If I am with someone whom I love
a) I'll let them know frequently
b) I'll let them know only on special occasions
c) Don't be soppy! They should know how I feel
Tried & true (a), can’t help it. +1 for the mushies!
Total: 9 I’m almost into double digits! Whoo!
8. If a man gives me flowers, I'll
a) Be deeply flattered and delighted
b) Think he is feeling guilty about something
c) Think he is soft and should probably go and toughen up
As long as they are REAL, LIVE flowers, in a pot, able to be transplanted & grow. No cut arrangements, then I’ll be an (a) and gain +1
9. In terms of libido and sexual drive
a) Sex is pleasurable, rather like a bar of chocolate
b) Sex is one of the greatest gifts of life. It delivers a level of pleasure and fulfilment rarely found elsewhere in life
c) Sex is completely overrated. I can quite happily go without.
Uh, chocolate? No, bring on choice (b) and the +3, thank you!
10. In terms of sexual frequency
a) As often and intensely as possible! Life is too short!
b) Save it up for special occasions only
c) Once in a blue moon is sufficient
Do you see why this is my favorite subject? (a) it is! And +2
11. In terms of sexual variation
a) Missionary position only for me!
b) I'll try a few different moves
c) The Kama Sutra is my bible. I'll certainly give anything a try if I can contort my body into position!
I love to read, and reading (c) has totally been done… a few times… to say the least. Hey, I did say reading! So calm down, hahaha! +2
12. In terms of kinkiness
a) I prefer it plain Jane and simple.
b) I'm willing to accommodate a little bit of teasing and games playing
c) So who's going to tie the other up first? And where did you put those shackles, sometimes my knots aren't that good!
Let’s play a game… and I’ll vote for (c) ANY day. +3
Total: 20 … that doubled quickly
13. In terms of attitudes towards sex
a) Casual sex is fine, as long as both people have a clear understanding
b) Sex should only occur after marriage
c) Feel free to sleep around as much as you wish! Who cares!
Casual sex is ONLY ok if ALL of the following exist: BOTH parties are aware & in agreement. There is NO serious commitment between the two parties (meaning there is not casual sex outside the relationship, if there exists a relationship). Neither party is in a committed relationship outside of the casual sex. Only then would (a) be my choice. +1
14. In terms of sexual context
a) Sex in a loving stable relationship is, ultimately, best
b) Random casual sex is more fulfilling
Hmmmmm, can’t say that I haven’t had my fill of (b), but I would totally go for (a) when given the choice, bringing an extra +1 my way.
15. In terms of openness
a) A lot of sexual acts are rather dirty and sinful
b) Within a few limits, I'm more than happy to try to accommodateanything that will make my partner sexually fulfilled. Just ask!
c) I don't see the point in doing anything that doesn't directly give me pleasure.
Ask and ye shall receive, (b)! And then I receive +3
16. In terms of a relationship, the one I truly love
a) Would be the most important aspect of my life. I'll try to move heaven and earth for them!
b) An important component, but they'll have to fit in around my career and lifestyle
c) There for me when I need them, but not integral to my life
I’m definitely (b), no question about that! Big fat ZERO here. But I’m not sacrificing my independence.
Total: still holding on at 25
17. In terms of a relationship, all decisions
a) Should be made on an equal basis. That is healthy.
b) The man should take control and show that he can be a man!
c) I'll decide, as men are too impulsived) We'll see what works for us
(d) because not everything in life is equal and therefore, go with the flow, see what happens…and slap another +1 my way
Politics Watch those hard earned points slip away into oblivion. Politics. Blech.
18. In terms of political views
a) I support Marxism
b) I support National Socialism
c) I support liberal democracy
d) I support Radical Traditionalism
e) I am primarily apolitical. All systems are ultimately a rather unsatisfying compromise.
(e) only because it’s the only one I halfway understand. I DON’T discuss politics. Ever. Somehow a +2 by default on this one.
19. On capitalism
a) Free markets should be allowed with no restrictions whatsoever
b) Certain limits should be in place
c) A necessary evil
(b) this I have a bit more opinion on, because of my business background. +1
Arts & Mind Now we’re cooking with gas!
20. In terms of film, if I had to choose, I mostly favor
a) A light hearted comedy or easy going film
b) Pure action, or typical big-screen Hollywood film
c) Bizarre, unusual, surreal art-house cinema
(a) all the way… into another big fat 0, but at least it’s not negative!
Total: Hanging in there with 29
21. In terms of books and magazines, if I had to choose, I mostly favor
a) Mainstream fiction and glossy mags
b) Challenging, complex, and unusual materials
(b) please, random pickings suit me best, +2
22. In terms of broadcast television
a) I love soaps! There is always something on I'd like to watch
b) Big Brother is my religion
c) Most television is so entirely lacking in any redeeming qualitiesthat I usually switch it straight off in disgust. Give me a good bookanyday!
d) I'll usually spend my evenings curled up in front of the telly
I don’t own a t.v., but I’m NOT flipped out hard core on the “t.v. has no redeeming qualities” issues, I simply have better ways to spend my precious minutes. I’m a (c), with out the disgust part. +3
23. In terms of conversations
a) Lets just have plenty of drinks and get drunk and have a laugh
b) Lets sit down over a coffee and have a truly meaningful and deep conversation
c) Just be polite and keep everyone happy
Uh oh, I’m torn here… I definitely have a night here & there full of drinks & laughter. However I LOVE good conversation yet don’t really have a fancy for coffee. (c) is completely out of the question. Since this is a relationship based quiz, in a relationship I tend to have a penchant for (b) – just not the coffee. +2
24. Beethoven or Mozart?
a) Come on. Clearly Beethoven by a significant degree.
b) Mozart is prettier.
c) Who are they? Wouldn't listen to either!
Slight concern with this question, I readily listen to both, and own cd’s of both their music, but am not NEARLY talented enough to compare & contrast to make a decision as to who is the better man. I’m voluntarily taking a zero here because there is not a neutral answer, nor is there one that I feel comfortable accepting.
25. In terms of cultural relativism,
a) It is absolutely absurd to even begin to compare the latest Spice Girls single with, say, Beethoven's 9th Symphony. The 9th is so many orders of magnitude superior in every dimension that such a comparison is pointless.
b) Everything is equally good
c) It depends entirely on context. On some levels the latest pop singles are just as good.
(c) but still only partial, I love music but am utterly talentless when it comes to having an ear for picking it apart. –1 for my lack of musical inclination!
26. In terms of range of tastes, and ability to accommodate alternative forms of expression
a) I am willing to accommodate a very wide range of artistic expressions. I listen very widely, read very widely, watch very widely, and do not get easily offended.
b) Plenty of things are rather offensive and should be either banned or severely controlled
c) There is no reason to ever offend anyone with anything that deserves to be called art
(a) all the way baby, get rid off the censors; If you don’t like what you hear, stop listening, +2
27. In terms of alcohol
a) Why not get hammered every Friday! You only live once
b) Many people use alcohol to mask emptiness elsewhere in there life. Enjoying yourself and letting yourself go is one thing, seeing all social occasions primarily as a drinking opportunity is a waste.
c) I am tee-total and believe that alcohol is a dangerous addiction just like many other things, such as pornography
(b) I’m down for a good time, but not every time. +1 for me!
28. When there is a commercial break on during a program I am watching on TV, I will
a) Sit there and watch in boredom
b) Specifically mute the television and go and make a cup of tea/coffeec) Sit there and watch with interest
Again, no t.v., but that is not to say that I NEVER watch it. If I have the choice, I flip programs or get up for a moment, thus (b) is the closest answer. +1 for the tv choice.
29. Tea or coffee?
a) Don't be daft, clearly Tea!
b) Tea is bland. Give me coffee.
c) You dare insult me with that question? How could anything compare, even to one billionth of a millionth of a degree, with the ultimate mightiness and true divinity of that most perfect of beverages, that most grand of plants, that most mighty of experiences, namely, the most high and holy, Tea! I salute thee, Tea! I forever recognize thy primordial and protean greatness!
d) I am a heretic and do not drink either tea or coffee.
e) You mean tea doesn't just come in packets of tea bags?
I don’t know that I would jump overboard with such gusto on (c), so I will stick with (a), although I’ve never used the term “daft” in my life. I find it quite cute. I would easily choose tea over any other drink, except water. I love water. Which is required to make tea. So there you go, bonus points?? +1
30. The person who constructed this irreverant quiz, is either
a) Completely and utterly bonkers and off his trolly
b) Of a fine mind, if a little eccentric
c) Really should have better things to do
d) Delightful, and since I am a fine young single women aged 18-35 I shall be enquiring after his e-mail address) Clearly desperate and lost beyond all hope
I STOLE the quiz, therefore I’d like to say (a), (b) & (d) … (a) is FUN. (c) is all true except the “fine” part, just plain Jane here, by a different name; and as of a mere 3 weeks ago, no longer single. That leaves (b) and +2
Total: 42 ** UH OH** Do to the scoring error, I now have a score of 44. Go me!
Answer grid is on Aren’s page. Be kind & go visit! I nearly choked a few times when I initially read this quiz. I was on hold at work & gasping for breathe when a person finally came to the line. Oh well!Maximum total is 67.
Now wasn’t that a joy??
The Tao of unsaying
9 months ago