I. close. my. eyes. and. I. smile. knowing. that. everything. is. alright.
I wish it were alright. I wish I were smiling. Instead, I can only look back at the moments I spent smiling, and then wonder where they went. How did I lose them already?
April's ocean theory - a person cannot survive within an ocean, cannot hold an ocean. It takes an ocean to blend with an ocean. I am a hurricane. Destructive? Maybe not what she meant, completely. She thinks he is also a hurricane. But how can two hurricanes work? Her response, "They become a tropical storm". Can that be healthy in any sense?
April, if that moment comes, where I'm sitting on the steps, questioning, tears or no tears, tell me that "No" is the answer. Don't even ask the question. Just a simple, firm, NO.
Tonight, depression drags me deeper.
4 months ago