f* my life

Last week while perusing Boobs, Injuries & Dr Pepper, I clicked the link and stumbled across F* My Life (fmylife.com). I'd love to give you the links to these pages, but I'm posting this from mobile blogger which doesn't allow me to insert hyper links (that I'm aware of) **EDIT - I have since fixed this via regular pc **.

I haven't laughed so hard in many many months! Hilarious and heart breaking all at once. The rules at FML are: every anecdote must start with "Today" and end with "FML" (Fuck My Life). There are no taboo subjects.

Examples (not mine):

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

Today, my husband of 9 years announced he was gay. He insinuated that he was only able to achieve erections because I looked like a man. FML

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

This is MY version, that happened nearly a month ago:

Today, I awoke to two pictures of engagement rings that my boyfriend wanted me to choose from. I immediately told him that I wasn't ready to talk about marriage with him because I am concerned that his divorce isn't final & he doesn't seem to be taking any steps to finalize it. He responded by having his "soon-to-be-ex" send me an email saying that she is happy for us & never wants him back. Immediately after she did what he requested, he blew up at me saying he was still in love with his WIFE & that we are over because I communicated with the woman who tore his heart out. FML